Chapman is an expensive University to attend. If you add up tuition, room & board, books, and others cost it really starts to ad up. As a result there is a fair amount of students that come from wealthy families. That doesn't mean that the school is only rich students, there are also students who come from middle or lower class families.
Michelle Thomas believes that students with wealth overwhelm this school. That if you walk around campus you see rich spoiled kids in there fancy cars complaining about the "sub-par" food. Well Michelle I am here to say that your opinion isn't worth anything. You are not as of great importance like many of the student body of Chapman University.
My father came from nothing and is now the largest entrepreneur on the west coast. Indeed he may spoil me, but I'm worth it. If I choose to be chauffeured in my Rolls Royce to class so be it. My father also donates millions a year to the University, so why should you tell my father how to spend his money? If he wants a helipad built on top of Beckman there will be a helipad there in less than three weeks.
I suppose that the school could use its money on things other than lavish fountains and record-breaking spheres. But are you the one donating money? No. You’re not paying anything. I concur that improvement can be made in other areas of the University. But until you have the money to put into the school, you will always be a little guy with no voice.
So if you will, please take the meritorious education given to you. Please stop complaining that you are not as wealthy as many of the other students at the University. Nobody listens to the little people any more anyways. So please, leave the people of greater importance alone. And maybe, just maybe, you will be as important as my father one day.
Nice article, I agree that even though there are a lot of wealthy students here I don't believe that the majority are in that upper class. I see just as many students driving older cars and have jobs to pay for their education. I would guess that the tone is angry, bitter, or almost repulsed by the way you responded to the article.
ReplyDeleteIt almost comes across as... arrogant. I guess it seems that way just because you mentioned a helipad/how you're worth it. Also, you get your point across when you talk about the unimportance of the little people.
ReplyDeleteI agree with CLaPlant that the piece does come off as arrogant, but it also kind of comes off as sarcastic.
ReplyDeleteSounds pretty pretentious. I'm so rich and I deserve it all! Screw the little people!
ReplyDeleteIt's so over the top that it comes off as satire, which simply means that you did a nice job on the voice. What you did best was to make it very consistent. Virtually every sentence is written in the voice.
I will say, though, that the voice definitely warms up. Compare the first paragraph to the last. I'd try rewriting the first to better reflect the voice of the rest of the article. The first paragraph is more rational, dull, info-foraging.
One suggestion: I think the text is a bit large.
Good division of paragraphs.
Satire very sarcastic with the donates millions to the college.
ReplyDeleteMy voice was to be pretentious. I was trying to show that I was of greater importance than the writer as well as everyone else. I wasn't quit angry just trying to get across the point that I'm better than you.
ReplyDelete